For years, I used to religiously give her flowers, even on non-occasions. I thought I was raking those pogi-points. But I was wrong.
One day she asked me to stop spending on flowers – because, after only a few days, they go to trash. She’d rather use the money for something else – on experience perhaps – even on those little moments that do not have price tags.
Apparently, her love language is not gifts (food yata! Or selfies! Haha). Service and words of affirmation are her dominant love languages. So whatever fancy flowers (or gifts) I give her, though she appreciates, it does not connect. So I stopped giving her flowers and I planted a garden of thoughts instead.
It is really important to understand our partner’s love language. It benefits both of you. It saves you from doing things that matter less and allows you to focus on things that fill the love tank.
Don’t get me wrong. If you have the means, it is very much okay to invest in fab things once in a while. Do a mashup of love languages. Because sometimes, WORDS SPEAK LOUDER THAN CERTAIN ACTIONS. Moreso if words match the actions.
HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!
